Daytime Divas (VH1)

DaytimeDivas

Daytime Divas (VH1) – Premieres 5th June

A comedic drama that centres on the hosts The Lunch Hour, a daytime talk show in the style of Loose Women and The View. In it, the creator and anchor of the show Vanessa is at continual loggerheads with the the other members of the programme.

After Vanessa ends up in coma from a botched plastic surgery procedure, three of her co-hosts begin trying to vie for the main hosting gig. As the first show after Vanessas hospitalisation airs she awakes from the coma to find out what has been going on, and starts to tinker with the shows production to stitch up the others that have been trying to get her job.

As this goes on she has the brainwave to continually sabotage the programme while pretending to be in the coma so her return will create a bigger buzz.

The show is like a mix between UnREAL and Desperate Housewives, though it doesn’t really work as the comedy parts rarely become apparent, and the dramatic side is equivalent to a poor daytime soap. It’s one to miss.

2.1/10

The Breaks (VH1)

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The Breaks (VH1) – Premieres 20th February – Renewed

Rap based drama set in the 90’s that follows on from the VH1 film of the same name. In it it follows Nikki, who has just landed a job to assist artist manager Barry Fouray who is looking into the possibilities of starting his own record label. DeeVee, Nikkis friend and music producer who is under suspicion of Ahm, the rapper he is working who believes DeeVee is a police informant. And Ahm, who Nikki is trying to get on Barry Fourays books as the latest up and coming star, and is under police investigation for murder.

For an VH1 drama it’s surprisingly good, with it being a grittier take on the rap industry than the almost comic like The Get Down, or the trashy soap opera style of Empire.

5.8/10

Leave It To Stevie (VH1)

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Leave It To Stevie (VH1) – Starts 19th December

Not satisfied with already having one reality show this year Stevie J of Stevie J & Joseline: Go Hollywood fame has ditched the missus and gone it alone. To fill the space previously taken up by his vapid former partner, he gets his children to move back into his home where they trash talk Joseline and Stevie takes his son out to pull women with.

What follows is Stevie trying to pull women, then finding out they want his help to achieve fame, then bemoaning to his kids he can only attract a certain type of woman.

It’s some epically mind numbing stuff.

1.2/10

Martha & Snoop’s Potluck Dinner Party (VH1)

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Martha & Snoop’s Potluck Dinner Party (VH1) – Starts 7th November – Renewed

A truly bizarre pairing where Snoop Dogg cohosts with Martha Stewart in a show that is a mix between Kocktails With Khloé and a cooking show. In it Snoop and Martha do a cook off each accompanied with a guest while talking bollocks and arseing about.

Another guest is introduced halfway through the cooking for added arseing about and talking bollocks and is also giving the job of being the possible deciding vote on who has produced the best dish.

After the cooking is done it then transfers over to the tasting which is done in an awkward Kocktails With Khloé sitdown at a table where they play one of those terrible dinner party games as a substitute to interviewing.

There’s also a DJ in the studio who looks like a DJ for a Bar Mitzvah, and a musical guest to play out the show where Martha Stewart moves awkwardly along to it.

It’s a weird car crash of a programme, a weird, weird car crash.

1.3/10

Shaunie’s Home Court (VH1)

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Shaunie’s Home Court (VH1) – Starts 17th July – Renewed

Standard reality shlock, this time following the ex-Mrs Shaquille O’Neal and her five children and two nannies as the go about their lives.

It’s a lot like For Peete’s SakeMeet The Smiths & It Takes A Sister, where a whole episode can happen and you realise that nothing much occurred. It’s completely forgettable.

1.7/10

The Amber Rose Show (VH1)

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The Amber Rose Show (VH1) – Starts 8th July – Cancelled

Like a lower budget Kocktails With Khloé, Amber Rose now has her own chat show. And she likes sex. We know this because it’s all she bangs on about in a desperate attempt to show off some form of personality.

Along with her saying how much she loves the sex, and having a visible battle with the autocue. Amber shares her much needed opinion on some pointless celeb news, interviews a fella that the tabloids say she’s dating, hunts out a member of the public to date the aforementioned fella and answers the relationship questions from her adoring audience.

It is marginally better than Kocktails With Khloé. But that’s like saying syphilis is better than gonorrhea.

0.8/10

Family Therapy With Dr Jenn (VH1)

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Family Therapy With Dr Jenn (VH1) – Starts 16th March

Aided by the anger management councillor from Coaching Bad, Dr Jenn gets five celebrity families to move into a rehab centre to help them with the problems that are causing riff between them, and in some cases trying to help individuals beat addictions.

With the patients being celebs it shows more of them acting like the center of attention, while kicking off against Dr Jenn and her staff and questioning her techniques. There’s very little in the ways of therapy going on and seems to more reveal in how fucked up the folks seeking therapy are.

It’s not good.

1.6/10