Somewhere Between (ABC)

SomewhereBetween

Somewhere Between (ABC) – Premieres 24th July

A comedically bad drama here where after a serial killer has begun a murder spree the local government put through a decision to restart executing prisoners, including one who while suffering of a mental disability was convicted of murder.

It follows Laura Price a TV producer whose husband Tom is a district attorney working on the cases coming up from the local governments recent decision, and Serena, their effortlessly annoying daughter.

As Serena skives off from doing her homework she chats online to Ruby, a fan of her favourite singer and daughter of the man on death row, leading her to sneak off from home to meet up with her. Laura discovers this and finds Serena at Rubys school. On the way back Laura and Serena stop off in fortune tellers house as they watch for someone to fix a punctured tyre. In the house the teller informs Laura that bad things will be happening to her soon and that she can’t change the future.

Three months later as the serial killer continues his reign of terror, Laura is working on her crimestoppers show as her babysitter arrives, so one of the shows runners takes Serena to them but between leaving the building and getting to the sitters can the kid is abducted by the killer. Laura then makes an appeal live on TV pleading to the killer to return her daughter. During this time the brother of the disabled convict, a former police detective called Nico, while working as a private investgator is kidnapped by mobsters he was looking into.

Serenas body is then found floating in the river leading Laura to go to the scene of the crime to commit suicide. At the exact same time and only a few feet away from Lauras suicide attempt, Nico is being tied up and chucked into the river by the mobsters. As Laura drowns she wakes up on the beach to head home only to find she’s gone back in time 3 months, and that she can possibly change the future events.

All-in-all it’s a convoluted plot with some really bad dialogue and shonky acting. If you want watch a time travel show where family members are save from a killer you’re better off viewing Frequency.

2.3/10

Battle of the Network Stars (ABC)

BattleOfTheNetworkStars

Battle of the Network Stars (ABC) – Premieres 29th June

A celebrity sports day reboot, where the celebs are teamed up in roles thar they are best known for and go against each other in 10 events under the captainship of DeMarcus Ware and Ronda Rousey.

The reboot is pretty much identical to the original even down to the hosts blazers. Though with the events being hosted in an university campus surrounded by a building site, it gives the show an empty feel only added by the fact that there are no spectators. It’s a lot like watching a school sports day where the competitions were made up on the spot.

It’s not a show you’d go out the way to watch.

1.8/10

The Gong Show (ABC)

TheGongShow

The Gong Show (ABC) – Premieres 22nd June

A reboot of the 70’s Variety show, where three judges sit rate amateur talent acts where the winner takes home a cheque for $2000.17. Though if the judges find the act to be boring they can hit the gong to halt the performance, or if the act makes it to the end they rate it out of ten.

The talent show itself is a plethora of borderline insane acts where the judges lightheartedly mock them along with the innuendo driven Mike Myers created host Tommy Maitland. And unlike other talent shows such Little Big Shots or any of the singing competitions, the acts are quickly introduced then they go straight into the thing, meaning there’s a constant stream of some truly weird stuff going on.

For what it is, it’s the most entertaining of the talent shows on offer since everything on it is up for ridicule and the acts play up to it. It’s a decent enough way to burn through 45 minutes if you fancy being constantly bemused at what you’re seeing.

4.0/10

Boy Band (ABC)

BoyBand

Boy Band (ABC) – Premieres 22nd June – Cancelled

Singing competition hosted by Rita Ora where 30 lads are judged by three “architects”, Nick Carter, Timbaland and Emma Bunton, where the final five singers remaining will become a signed boyband.

The initial round of the show has all 30 performing indivdually in front of the “architects”, followed up where a couple of the contestants are chosen to pair up to see if they can perform in certain boyband scenarios.

After which the “architects” whittle the 30 down to 18, and three groups of 6 are formed. These groups then have to go through learning a song and routine where the weakest two members are put up for elimination with the loser leaving the show.

For a singing competition it’s no different to The X Factor and the like, where the performers backstories all seem to have varying elements of personal tribulations set to emotive backing tracks. The show offers nothing different to what is already out there and is a slog to sit through.

1.6/10

Steve Harvey’s Funderdome (ABC)

STEVE HARVEY

Steve Harvey’s Funderdome (ABC) – Premieres 11th June

A take on Dragons Den/Shark Tank where in front of a studio audience two inventors pitch their product leaving the audience to vote on which product should receive the funding.

In the show it goes through three seperate areas of inventions, where the creators can win between $10k to 100k depending on how close the product is to be ready for release. After the pitches are finished and Steve Harvey has completed his range of befuddled expressions, the crowd proceed to vote on their favoured invention.

Before the winner is revealed the two inventors are given the opportunity to cash in early where they can buzz in during a cash reveal to accept a lower cash value if they think their product won win the vote. If someone does take that cash then the remaining inventor gets the total cash only if the crowd backed them. If no one decides to cash in early the it does to a straight head-to-head reveal where the winner gets the money and the loser gets nowt.

It’s not the greatest bit of programming but is watchable enough if you need to waste 45 minutes and like seeing a crowd decide on a products future after seeing a 3 minute pitch.

4.5/10

Still Star-Crossed (ABC)

StillStarCrossed

Still Star-Crossed (ABC) – Premieres 29th May – Cancelled

A romantic drama that’s based on the book which answers the question that few have asked, what happened after the end of Romeo and Juliet? And it’s answered in the most confusing nonsensical way possible.

After going through the setup of the two families, the Montagues and the Capulets, being at war with each other and the whole Romeo and Juliet situation being played through. It then sets up the storyline where after the families continue their feud, the Prince of Verona passes down the royal decree to end the fighting where one of Juliets cousins Rosaline, is to marry one of Romeos cousins. Neither of which are thrilled by the proposition.

As Rosaline protests the plan with the Prince they end up getting together as Romeos cousin watches on, and a weird love triangle is formed. And a needlessly confusing and boring programme is born.

It is to Shakespeare what Reign was to the life and times of Mary Queen of Scots. It is really, really crap.

1.7/10

Downward Dog (ABC)

DownwardDog

Downward Dog (ABC) – Premieres 17th May – Cancelled

Canine based comedy that follows Nan, a 30 something who is being continuously being overlooked at work and is in the middle of an on/off relationship, and her dog Martin.

While one half of the show is about Nan and her trying to get career and private life on track, the other half has Martin giving reality style musings to camera where he goes through his neurosis about not understanding his owner.

While the setup is pretty interesting the show itself doesn’t have much going comedy wise. Still, there’s been worse network comedies.

3.8/10